The Library

“No matter who you are, no matter where you live, and no matter how many people are chasing you, what you don't read is often as important as what you do read.” ― Lemony Snicket

Have I ever mentioned that I love books? I love the way they feel, the way they smell, and the way they look. Walking into a bookstore or a library, and being surrounded by books (and silence!) is one of the happiest feelings I can think of.

Our house was always full of books- picture books, school books, exciting books, boring books, dictionaries, chapter books, and books that consisted of taped together construction paper, childish drawings and words written by ourselves.

I was always encouraged to read. Books at bedtime, books during the day, books while eating breakfast. My favorite part of school was when Mom would read aloud to all of us- we would beg her to read more after the required reading for the day was done, and most of the time, she happily obliged. Books on tape were listened to in the car, or we would each bring our own books along and read while Dad drove.

I may have mentioned before that I used to get grounded from reading. Because it was my favorite thing to do, and I rarely did anything else, my parents would take books from me every once in a while to get me to behave.

Not only was I encouraged to read, but I was encouraged to read a variety of books, and for some reason, I had a problem with that. I would read the same books, over and over and over again. I had this thing for Jeanette Oak and Beverly Lewis- and any other other Christian fiction author that wrote very predictable, romantic books. Every time we went to the library, I would check out/renew the very same books that I had taken home the week before.

One day, while I was reading (and probably about 12-13 years old), Mom happened to glance at the title of my book. "Didn't you have that book out last week? And the week before that?"

"Yes."

She then asked me to bring her all of the books that I had just checked out from the library- and every single one of them had been checked out numerous times before.

"You can read these this time, but when we take them back to the library, you are not allowed to check them out again. I don't want you to check out any more books from the Christian section- you can go anywhere else in the library."

I was shocked. I was also furious. When we visited the library the next time, it was as if I was walking into the building as a different person. There were books everywhere, and I could not hide in the safe section of books that I knew so well. I didn't know where to start, but once I did, I didn't want to return to my safety zone.

I don't remember what I checked out that day, but I know that it was soon after that I read the book that Mom had encouraged me to read for years- To Kill a Mockingbird. The book was was fascinating, and full of swearing and so different from the typical books I read, and it was just so... completely wonderful. I remember being nervous that Mom would take these new books away from me, because the characters were presented with difficult choices, they swore and God wasn't the central focus of the book. But she didn't. Of course, I'm sure that she monitored what I was checking out, to make sure that I wasn't reading raunchy romance novels and such, but I don't remember ever being reprimanded for checking a certain book out. My stack of books was filled with titles such as "A Walk to Remember", "The Diary of Anne Frank", "1984", "Animal, Vegetable, Miracle," and the like.

I eventually wandered back into the Christian section and checked a few books out, and learned how to balance different genres of books. I still occasionally read Christian fiction, though I don't read the same books over and over, and if I find the book to be too predictable, I generally don't even attempt to finish it. If you are looking for a good Christian author to read, I recommend Francine Rivers and Mary DeMuth. (I would love to hear suggestion from you, too!)

From the Christian books I learned to be kind, to keep Christ as a focal point in my life and that marriage is a gift from God- and those are very good things to have learned, yes? From stepping out of that section of the library, and into something new, I learned that life is hard, life is not full of fairy tales and not all stories have a happy ending. I learned that marriage, though it can be good, is not the only reason that a person lives, and that you can live a Christian life without being married or having a boyfriend. I learned that people aren't perfect.

Why did I feel so safe and happy reading from the Christian section of the library? Perhaps it was because I thought that the stories were romantic. Perhaps it was because there was little to no conflict in the books I read. Perhaps I thought that because the books were written by Christian, authors, the books were perfect, and reading them would make me more perfect.

To assume that books that were not written by Christian authors were instantly evil, and that "Christian" books were instantly good was just....wrong. We are all sinners- even Christians and Christian authors. Just as non-Christian books aren't perfect, Christian books aren't perfect, either. Christians and non-Christians alike can make beautiful art, amazing music, and well written books, and I believe that discretion should be used when reading books from both types of authors.

My mom, through books, helped me to step into a broader view of life that I wasn't learning about from reading the same old Christian fiction novels over and over, and I am very thankful for that. She got me out of a rut and helped me to try new things.

Thanks, Mom! ♥